But before you folks start worrying that I'm going to get too serious and bore you all to death with political ramblings let me assure you I will commentating on the proceedings in my own unique manner. Now in preparation for this stupendous intellectual feast I feel I should get into the right frame of mind - So naturally I've been contemplating sending Mr T some false expenses for some shoes I've never worn, a second mortgage for a house I don't own, and £3.00 receipt for a sandwich I didn't buy. However, then I thought twice about ripping Mr T off and decided the best thing to do would be to just "lose" his credit card in the spin cycle.
But then I had another thought - why not just get out my Chrissy prezzies and get in the mood that way? So here's the first prezzie, a gift from the Young Masters;
Just in case you can't read the writing on my mug it reads; "Politically Incorrect And Proud." Yes, it's true; Mrs T is one of a dying breed prepared to say Up Yours to Mr Brown. (And indeed anyone who annoys me including Katie Fforde (repetitive books), Beyonce (repetitive songs) and Basil Brush (ticklish tail.)
Hmm... you know I've been looking closely at my mug and I think there's a slight fault.....the middle finger isn't raised.
So anyway, whilst I'm giving you the lowdown on what's happening in the UK I will be sipping my coffee (or maybe Options 40 calorie Hot Chocolate) from my Politically Incorrect And Proud mug.
Secondly, (and this a bit personal folks so breathe in) when I go to the Ladies Room I will be using my Gordon Brown loo roll;
Yep, whenever Gordon drops a clanger - I will be dropping one too - and you know where! Yes, yes I know it's not very polite of me but remember I'm 45 - I haven't got much time left to have fun!
(Oh by the way I expect to run out of paper by the end of the first week.)
And thirdly, I will be using this;
In case you can't figure it out - it is an electronic drawing board which I got from Mr T for Christmas. Now I know I usually moan about my electronic gifts from Mr T (breadmaker, sat nav, washing machine etc etc) but I did actually request this in the vague hope that I might do something artistic - I don't know what - but I'm sure that A Level in Art will come in useful one day. It hasn't yet. Although ... come to think of it.... I do use it to pull my artistic weight over Mr T when it comes to choosing colour schemes for the house;
Mr T; I like this green paint.
Mrs T; The cream is nicer.
Mr T; What about this blue?
Mrs T; Cream goes with everything.
Mr T; I fancy something a little different. How about that peach colour?
Mrs T: No.
Mr T: Lilac?
Mrs T; No.
Mr T: Yellow?
Mrs T: Look, which one of us has got the A level Art?
Mr T: (sighs) You have.
Mrs T: Enough said. Right that's 5 tins of cream paint. 12 rolls of cream wallpaper and some cream cushions. You can have that small tin of green paint for your Airfix models. Oh.... and here's your credit card; I found it in the washing machine.
So there you have it; watch this space for Mrs T's highly intellectual guide to the UK elections. You may learn a thing or two - or very possibly - nothing!
